Falling Star
by Despondent Cackling
Summary: One day, Yachi considers why Hinata doesn't admire her as she does him.


**Falling Star**

 _One day, Yachi considers why Hinata doesn't admire her as she does him._

* * *

Hitoka Yachi , First-year at Karasuno High School, fallen star. Location: Grass patch behind the general office. Cause of death: Collison with pole.

Yachi grimaced, clutching her throbbing forehead. She staggered away from the pull-up bars, off the wet grass, and crumpled onto a piece of concrete ground. _You're going to die, You're going to die_ , her inner voice screamed at her. _Why were you running just because you were excited, you should have prowled cautiously like always. And you're going to kick the bucket, just like when you were a little girl and you hit your head at the corner of that shelf…_

 _But you hadn't died then._ So it might not be fatal after all! If she was lucky, she might only have sustained a minor fracture to the skull, and be able to escape with her life. She drew her trembling hands away from her head to check the damage.

What she saw on them nearly killed her anyway.

"B-b-blood!" Crimson liquid trickled from her fingers onto the ground. Suddenly, reality fulminated into a film reel. An infant was wailing, A young girl was learning to ride a bike, a grade school girl trembled as she awaited her test results, a Yachi just one year her junior preparing dinner for when her mother came home. _Heaven, I really do not wish to go yet._ But her spirit was already drifting towards Heaven's light…

"Oh, Yachi! Why are you sitting there? Are you okay?" A familiar voice yanked her soul back to the corporeal realm. She looked around for her savior, and saw Yamaguchi standing behind her, staring at her quizzically. She moved her hands to let him have a good look at the wound.

"Ahm…B-b-bleeding."

Yamaguchi expression turned to shock. "B-bleeding? Oh no! What can I do?"

Her vision was getting dizzy. "G-g-get first aid…" She collapsed on the ground. Yamaguchi's jaw dropped.

* * *

The _cracks_ of volleyballs striking the court filled her ears. Yachi lay prostrate at the edge of the gymnasium, humming as she worked on her homework. An ice pack sat on her bandaged head. She penned her answer for Question 17b on the test booklet. Then, after ruminating for a moment, she cancelled out the answer neatly with a straight line and wrote her revised answer in smaller font above it.

Her gaze wandered to the courts where Karasuno's team was practicing. Orange hair flashed by. She swiftly looked back down.

She looked back up again. A feeling of tenderness completely saturated her. Sweat bathed Hinata's well-toned body and black uniform, his tussled hair shone like silver. His eyes ignited with that ethereal fire that she had originally feared but had grown to somehwat admire as his whole body shivered with tension. _He's going to do the freak quick with Kageyama._

His shoes screeched as they pushed off. The small athletic boy raced across the court, dissolving into a blur. Yachi felt the air leave her lungs as he jumped, soared like a bird of prey into the sky as the ball reached its peak of altitude. Faster than she could comprehend, he smashed the ball down, landing it just before the net. He descended to earth, a human once more. For a moment, the orange haired and dark haired boy were stunned by the enormity of their accomplishment, then cheered and pumped their fists in unison.

Yachi hid her face again, but could not prevent her lips from forming a quavering smile. _It wasn't fair_. Why did she have to fall for Hinata? It seemed like he had everything, and she had nothing. Though her friends would probably disagree with her. Muddle-headed Akano might say, "He's cute in a way, but only if you want to pinch his cheeks." Hisayo, who spent as much time gossiping as she did studying, might add "Ya, I hear he's good at volleyball, but there are plenty of guys out who are sporty and smarter and better-looking."

"Tadao Hoshino…" Akano sighs dreamily.

"You're so weird, Yachi."

"S-s-shut up!" She'd bluster, turning red. "I knew I shouldn't have told you two!"

Yachi chuckled. She could never understand them.

"So why do you like him anyway?" Hisayo asks. She smirks. "Is because he's handsome and intellectual? Yachi glared daggers. Why did she have to bring that up Sensei? That was when she was ten!

"Well, no" she'd admit. "In fact, he's not very good at studies, and he's quite short."

Akano stifled a giggle. Hisayo kept her smirk. "Ya, we know that. But why _do_ you like him?"

Yachi blushed and ducked, tapping her fingers together.. "Well, he's really enthusiastic and nice..." She couldn't stop the smile on her face from forming. "And when he's around, I feel safe."

Her reverie was broken by a volleyball that came hurtling to the spot next to her and almost caused her to have a heart attack. Kageyama faced a petrified Yachi as he ran by, "Sorry!" He said. "Hinata hit the ball too hard and it went out." He muttered under his breath. "Even though I told him not to."

 _Hinata_. Suddenly a thought crossed her mind. "Oh yeah, Kageyama, how has Hinata been lately?"

Kageyama turned back. "What do you mean how's he been?"

 _Urk_. She quickly backtracked. "Uh, I mean, the finals are coming up in a month, and we have a training camp in Tokyo right after that. Do you think he'll need any help?"

Kageyama looked suddenly serious. "Hinata's an idiot, but he knows he needs to pass. He might ask for your help, but he's already begun some early studying. If it's volleyball, he's willing to do anything."

 _Yes._ Yachi felt inexplicably sad. _Yes he is_.

* * *

At the end of every school day, she and Hinata walked together for fifteen minutes before they parted at a crossroads. It was in these brief spells that she gradually fell for him.

They never discussed anything special during these brief perambulations, mostly trivial matters about school and life. Normally, she avoided such conversations because she always worried that she would say something wrong that would make the other party hate her and want to kill her. But she never worried with Hinata. Usually, she would just listen in silence as Hinata exuberantly talked about whatever had happened during volleyball practice that day. How each member of the team was progressing, how excited he was for the upcoming match or training camp, how he felt he was growing closer to the Little Giant day by day. Occasionally, he would ask her something about her life, but her answers were usually terse.

"Hey, Yachi, do you have anything that you're really passionate about as well?"

"I guess I like drawing and design. My mom would be horrified if I didn't."

And then the subject was quickly dropped. _It's fine_ , she thought, _I don't have anything interesting to say anyway , and I much rather know about your day._

Once, as they were walking, Hinata pointed out how the moon looked really gigantic that night. "It's amazing!" he said.

"Yeah, it is. " She nodded.

"It's a good omen for the Spring Nationals!" Hinata proclaimed. Yachi beamed, and said something that caused Hinata to be even more fired up and rant more.

"When I first heard we were 'fallen crows' from Daichi-san, I couldn't believe it! I always dreamed of entering Karasuno, and now that I was in, I couldn't imagine losing over and over again. Kageyama felt the same, so we both trained until we thought we were invincible…But even that wasn't enough, and we still ended up losing to Aoba Johsai. " He glared at nothing and pumped his fist. "That's why we've been working twice as hard lately , because we're not going to lose again!"

Yachi stared at the fire broiling in his eyes. _Why do I feel somewhat disappointed when I see him like this?_

Suddenly, Hinata's grim expression broke. A smile graced his face as he looked up at the sky. "But even if we don't win, I would still want to play volleyball."

Suddenly Yachi's breath was as cold as ice. She stared at Hinata's face, into those dark pools that seemed to see beyond everything, into a reality where only volleyball existed. She looked up as well. The sky was almost cloudless. The black maw of space gaped endlessly above her, its countless stars glared piercingly down at her like waiting archers. Above it all, the giant moon hung like an invitation, the holy gatekeeper, the bridge between heaven and earth. It looked close enough to reach. She knew that if a crow were to fly towards it at top speed, it could breach the gap between the stratosphere and the world of dreams, and stay there permanently.

 _Do you feel the same way as I, Hinata? Would you be content to stay on the earth and watch the stars from afar, so you shall not ever need to experience the hellish fear of falling? Or does every part of your body itch to soar into the skies to join their ranks, even if it means giving up everything?_

Yachi stared at her own flightless limbs, and sighed.

Times like that, she felt so close to him, and yet impossibly far. She understood why felt safe with him now. He was the sun of the planet she lived on, whose brilliance kept her warm. And her, its lonely inhabitant.

* * *

A shrill peal rang through the gymnasium. Yachi watched in silence as the volleyball team did their cooling-down jog.

She stared down at the notebook on her lap, the one that she used in her role as manager. The two open pages were dedicated to records of the team's attempted techniques that day; one for Hinata's and Kageyama's quick attacks, the other for Nishinoya's libero set. On each page that were a miscellany of vertical lines and 'O"s, representing the number of successes and failures respectively. At the bottom of each section, she would write the number of successes over the number of attempts and circle it, much like she was giving a test score.

 _The percentages are getting higher_ , she noted. _Everyone's working hard._

After Coach Ukai had debriefed the team and encouraged them to eat and sleep well, Yachi moved quietly up to him. "Er, Ukai-sensei, here are the results for the quick attacks and Nishinoya's libero drills for today." She handed him her notebook.

"Thank you, Yachi." He copied the results into his own notebook and handed hers back to her. A wry smirk crossed his devilish face. "Seems like they're all improving, huh?"

"Yes! Everyone's really pumped for the Spring Tournament!"

A look of satisfaction washed over him. "That's good, high morale will just boost their chances of winning even more."

Just as she was about to leave: "By the way, Yachi, I need to thank you as well. You've been a great help ever since you became a manager. "

 _I'm not even working that hard._ Her face contorted and she bowed. "Ukai-Sensei, thank you!"

"I don't know what we would do without you."

 _You would do just fine without me._ She thought, her face burning. _Though I promised Mom that I would try my best as manager of Karasuno's volleyball team, my job just isn't that challenging_. _Since my list of duties are so basic, I even have time to do her homework while doing it! Anyone can replace me!_

No, that wasn't completely true. She suddenly thought of that poster, the one that she had drawn and designed herself to attract sponsors for Karasuno's volleyball team. She remembered how the pride swelled inside her chest when she learned that it had actually succeeded. To think, someone had forked out money because of her own drawings and words! It was the first time she had experienced anything like it.

 _And it was all because Hinata had pulled me._ Her gaze flitted over to the other corner of the gymnasium, where the small boy was chatting and gesticulating excitedly to his teammates. She remembered the words that had pushed her to put in the sweat and tears into making the poster. "Townsperson B can fight too!" Without his encouragement, she would have been too afraid to do it of her own accord.

Too afraid that if she fell, she could never pick herself up again.

That was her whole life, wasn't it? She always only gave the minimal amount of effort in everything, unless somebody pushed her along. She only got good results in school _because_ her parents wanted her to. She only decided to join as manager because Shimizu had pleaded her so badly. She was just a piece of debris, pulled into movement by bodies greater than her. Otherwise, she was just a throwaway waste of space, no better than trash.

 _I'm sick of being pulled. I want to be my own light._ The feeling seared through her like a fever.

Before she could think twice, Yachi's back snapped up, and almost shouted, "Ukai-sensei, there's something I need to tell you!"

"Huh?" Coach Ukai's eyes widened. "What is it?"

"Kageyama and Hinata's spikes—the ones they fail— the main reason is because Kageyama sometimes sets too far away from the net!"

Coach Ukai stared for a moment as if he had seen a statue talk. Then, he sighed and grinned knowingly. "Thank you, Yachi, that will be very helpful for our next session. "

 _That's not enough._ "A-also, I'll do some research on the powerhouse schools Karasuno are facing in the Spring Tournament!"

Coach Ukai stroked his chin. "Karasuno has already gone up against Aoba Johsai in the last tournament and had a practice match against them, so I don't think we'll need to know more about them. You should focus your energy on researching the other schools. And get Shimizu to help you."

"Yes, sir!" Yachi's bowed fiercely.

"Thanks."

As she was walking away, Coach Ukai called her name. He held a thumbs up. "Thank you, Yachi, for giving your 100%!"

 _That's still not enough._ She thought, her stomach churning.

* * *

Three days later, Yachi slumped at her desk, vision bleary from fatigue. She looked up at the digital clock on her desktop shelf. It was 12:19. _Time to sleep so I can be fresh for school tomorrow_. She yawned and stood, then clambered onto her bed. She laid her head on the pillow. Satisfaction suffused her heart as she looked at the think bunch of papers in her open school bag. Her eyelids closed.

 _I still want to do something else._ The thought jolted her awake just as she was drifting of. She hopped off her bed and sidled up to her desk. She opened the bottom drawer of her desk and procured a piece of paper and a slim metal caser. The case opened easily, revealing a melange of pencils, pens and brushes. _My art supplies._

After ruminating for a while, she drew manga borders on the paper with a straight edge. Then, she began to sketch out the storyboard for the idea that had popped up in her head.

"I wonder what I should call it." She pondered with the blunt end of the pencil on her chin. Orange hair flashed across her mind like a shooting star. At the top of the paper, where she had intentionally left a band of blank space, she wrote in kanji, 'Karasuno's Haikyuu: Crows that Rise after Falling.'

There. It wasn't perfect, but she could change it later when she was done. More importantly, this was the most excited she had felt about anything for a long time. She pinched her tired arms and grinned. It was going to be a long night.


End file.
